the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
