can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
