I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
