I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
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