ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Randomize
