No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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