is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
