grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
