quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
