I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
