did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
handjob tips. give me some.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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