Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
