I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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