Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
