Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
