dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
