Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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