I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
