its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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