Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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