theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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