you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
