I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
