Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
How drunk are you?
Completed.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
