Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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