I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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