i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
