I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
