I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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