did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Randomize