I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
