Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
