As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
