im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
