I must be too annoying 4 u.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
