doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Randomize
