He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Randomize
