My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize