You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
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