This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
