Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Randomize
