i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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