Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
