Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
