Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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