i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
