So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
