oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize