She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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