Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
