i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I'm like, not good at living.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Randomize
