Christians are straight up FREAKS
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
