laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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